All those moments in life that leave an impression, leave you in deep thought,and contemplation.
Find book reviews for reading that feeds the soul. Personal experiences, travel stories- for spirituality is a daily pursuit. Movie and art, as what works better therapy than these.
Sharing my inspirations, write-ups and artsy creations.
Book and film reviews and random abstruse musings.
Have you ever felt a yearning for something you can’t even define?
A keen longing for something you can’t pinpoint even when you are in abundance
of everything you want or need.
A dull ache deep in the heart for something beyond your comprehension.
A desire you are not aware of. A pain that has not got its due attention.
Some grief, not expressed, perhaps. Something. Homesick perhaps, even in the
comfort of your own home, amidst the love of your family. Homesick for another
It is a feeling that I have long searched meaning for. I
have felt this time and again. Mostly while traveling to new places, leaving back
known faces, and saying goodbyes, whenever the canvas of life looms large over me-
the miniscule human. What am I but a tiny dot in the vast expanse
of universe and time? A strange energy fills me, mostly in moments that
I realize would become precious memories of numerous tomorrows. I get
goosebumps as the vibes take over and it is as if Life descends into my very being.
I watch, I see, I feel and I miss. I can’t let go. It’s as if
something beautiful is passing, is in creation and I am seeing it happen- the
process and realizing that it’s not tangible. It is not capturable, it’s just a
feeling, and I know it will pass. Reality will come in any moment now. Practicality
will enter any second.
Last time I felt this was just a week ago. I and my best
friend were traveling to attend a dear school friend’s wedding. Years pass so
quickly. Memories of schooling and play times were just so fresh. While
returning too I felt that same passing sentiment. It is as a part and parcel of my
very being. It makes its presence felt whenever I am nostalgic or spiritually
Home is not
a place- It’s a person.
It’s like we are born on this planet to reach out to so many
lives through the years. Some connections are just meant to happen.
You are just meant to meet the person who would play a major role in your life.
Or when you are in need that person meant
to help you would pass right by. Strange are the ways of life.
And there are some people whom you would yearn to meet
again. But you are never meant to meet them ever again in this lifetime. Life
has strange mysteries. It plays out in stranger ways. You have no
control over life. Or death for that matter. You might be thanking the Gods
that someone at least exists in this very world you thrive in, while he might
be long dead. And you, oblivious of his demise might live a happy life of least
passing. Make sure you have your stay.
How many times have you felt something special when you met someone,
but then had to let go as the time was not right, or the acquaintance was brief
or things in your opinion were not meant to be? Or just that you
thought you were not ready? How many times have you stopped yourself from
talking to someone your eyes played hide and seek with because you didn’t want
to seem too interested? How many times have you made yourself seem unapproachable
to the other person wanting to bare his heart’s tales? How many times have you
made him turn the other way, sad and disheartened without a chance to say how
he felt, by your steel beliefs and stoic looks?
How many times have you let love,
genuine love pass you by while you were looking the other way cribbing about
life and other monotonous things? How many times have you looked in the
mirror and chastised yourself for the lack of courage to look just right in his
eye? How many times have you wallowed in self pity, “I have no stories to talk
about in my best friend’s next pajama party.” You don’t let stories happen. You
don’t let people in. Afraid of things being anything less than perfect-
your bookish imagination of perfect.
places as Life happens
While some of my friends are getting engaged, some are
getting married, and some are sharing awesome love lives with their adorable
partners, I am still trying to come to terms with life and my Facebook wall which
is full of congratulatory messages. My can’t help but think why my life has no
story- love story to be specific. Why was I so closed that love just couldn’t
enter the high rise walls? Now at this stage, dealing with the quarter
life crisis of a perhaps failed attempt to reinstate a career, or define my
goals, when my peers are moving onward and forward both in their professional
and personal lives, I feel lonely more than ever.
I miss so many people. For me it’s very easy to miss people. Friends.
Acquaintances. Buddies. Loving someone is the easiest and the most accessible emotion,
but I also tend to hide or dismiss it the most. Life of a philophobic. I fear having my own baby any time in life. The
thought of having no way out of loving someone so much, beyond anything I have
ever known, scares me to death.
perhaps a calling
Sometimes not knowing what I seek drives me crazy. I feel like
an idiot bulldozing around in life, spear heading things that don’t really matter
to me, championing projects I don’t care about, studying my ass off for some national examination I, perhaps, don’t have the right aptitude for, just so I could be respected by
my parents, relatives and society in general. I don’t know what I am doing.
Where I am headed to, what I am made for.
But then there’s this thought- why should I rush? Let’s take
things slowly, just breath for a few days, then take on new ventures and learn
from failures. Figuring out what we actually seek is a lifelong process after all.
But I do feel like an alien in this planet. I feel like I
was born in the wrong era, wrong age, wrong time. I feel like I belong somewhere
else, where I don’t have any freaking idea about. I feel homesick. Forever I
shall perhaps remain homesick.Homesick for another world. Another
timeline, dimension or whatever you want to call it.
Home has been elusive. I hope I’d find my home soon.
Empress Ki is the most elaborate, gripping, and thrilling series I have watched this year. And at 51 episodes, it is the longest Korean drama series I have ever watched. Even though the number seems daunting and too much, it’s worth it all. If you like period dramas, you won’t want to give this one a miss.
It was in 2016 that I first read about Empress Ki, the historical drama that had garnered much praise and accolades from the audience and critics alike. Most Korean dramas are just 16 or 20 episodes long. So 51 seemed never-ending to me then. It wasn’t until 2017 that I decided to at least try the first episode. And I was hooked. But owing to the various circumstances I didn’t continue watching it. It was just last month that I remembered this epic story and watched it to completion within just a few days. Believe it or not, midway through it, I was almost literally pulling my hair out, in anticipation of what would happen next.
I would have given this magnum opus 10/10 had it stopp…
I have always been the one to leave first. Be it luck or circumstance, it has always been this way. Some of the times it has been my decision to venture out of my comfort zone first before all my peers decide to do the same and I am left behind, alone in the old world. The decisions are out of fear of being left alone, most of the times. Or is it self-preservation instead?
I am a person who takes time to adapt, make new friends, get accustomed to new surroundings- an unlikely one to leave first- yet I do. You might think me selfish, but I am just afraid, and I decide to take care of myself first. Some might see this as a major risk-taking attitude, but I mostly see it as fleeing before the 'desertion' hits me instead. Now that's a strong word indeed. I am always in search of safe ground, always so insecure and calculating my moves lest I end up being alone on the island.
Paranoiac. Several things bother me at once. What if my peers get on with their lives leaving me behi…
July has been a special month for me. Not just because it is my birthday month, but because many new beginnings, many fresh starts, and many turning points of my life have happened in July. It's mid of the year when I have looked back at what the year was like for the first six months and have anticipated and dreamt about the coming six months. Goals and resolutions are reviewed in July.
These initial days of college are all about fun, making interactions, creating friendships and increasing your network. It's less on course works and assignments. So we are trying to take full advantage of it. I have made a few friends at the hostel too, most of them are my juniors, with a huge age gap. But the good news is none of us can feel this gap. We visited the Forest Research Institute this weekend. It was a good trip. I stopped at almost every tree to take a snap and posed at every corner of the museum clicking selfies. Too much beauty in a single place. Beauty overloaded. The view of t…
"When the ego dies, the soul awakes." - Mahatma Gandhi
Why do you have such a huge ego? You cannot wear your family's name on your sleeve as an identity forever. The world wouldn't see you through the eyes of your parents who have pampered you so much for the better part of your life. Here in the real world, you will get what you give. Respect begets respect. Selfishness begets selfishness. Hate begets hate. And your 'i don't care', 'i don't give a damn', 'i am paying money for that', 'i will do as I please' attitude will give you the same.
Respect is earned. Agreed. But you should give it first to earn it back. The other person should and must be respected by default despite his class, caste, job and family background, until and unless he proves unworthy of it with time. I stand strongly by this belief.
There can be no excuse for disregard. The way you speak to me about people tells me the way you might be speaking about me t…
Odia is my mother
tongue but I had never really focussed on Odia novels, given that I love
reading. Of late I realised that I should explore the culture and language of
my native land, and see for myself whether it suits my reading sensibilities. I
read “Jagyaseni” by Pratibha Ray a few years back, over a span of several
months. It is a retelling of Mahabharata from Draupadi’s perspective, which
brings about her inner turmoils, confusions, decisions, desires and dreams,
really well. It was the first Odia novel I ever read. Three days back, I
completed reading my second novel in Odia, coincidentally it is by the same
author. “Punyatoya” - literally it means the river, or ‘as pure as the river’.
It is also the name of a revered river in Indian mythology. The book has been
translated into Hindi with the same title, with the tagline “the story of a
village girl Meghi”. Other translated versions are in Marathi and Malayalam. The story follows a
young girl named Barsha, dearly called Meghi at…
One Friday evening, as I was feeling a bit lonely and homesick with nothing much to do, not even strolling on the terrace viewing the ever so beautiful mountains since it was raining hard- thus it also contributing to my gloomy mood, I decided to watch Before Sunrise. Yes, once again. A first for me. I rarely re-watch a movie. Yearning for a light-hearted yet meaningful conversation this was the best choice I had. My hostel mates were out in the city and all the people I called up were busy. Luck by chance. Thanks to the superb uninterrupted internet connection I had a great 1 hour 40 minutes that evening.
"Experiencing the otherworldly. When morning comes, we would all turn into pumpkins."
Even though it sounds like a cliche today, unplanned trips, adventures in life, serendipity and providence are romantic. Before Sunrise has all of these, when strangers indulge in light conversations, grow intrigued about each other's lives, and spend time in each other's company …
‘Kill Me Heal Me’ has a great storyline, a plot that doesn’t adhere to any of your active imagination, presumption, preconceived notion or stereotypes. About the series- a bit of the plot: "A romantic comedy between a third-generation billionaire with Dissociative Identity Disorder and a first-year Psychiatrist resident who treats him secretly. After a traumatic experience in his childhood, Cha Do Hyun suffers memory lapses and his personality then fractured into seven different identities. He tries to regain control over his life with the help of Oh Ri Jin, a first-year psychiatric resident who treats him secretly. But Ri Jin’s twin brother, Oh Ri Ohn, is a famous mystery novelist who investigates about Do Hyun and his family." Acting Skills of the Lead Actor
You wouldn’t want to miss the great acting skill of the lead actor- the one having multiple personality disorder. Every personality has different fashion sense, gait, body language, accent- the very aura around each perso…