Looking Beyond Stereotypes #IAmCapable

Appearance is not everything. Even today whenever a potential marriage prospect is looked up for a son in the family, the parents and all the extended relatives search for a fair bride with impeccable looks who adheres to all their notions of character, behavior, poise and upbringing. But little do they realize the fact that these notions do not really work for a happy, complete and prosperous marriage. The girl is more than her looks and appearance. She is her choices, her mottos, her viewpoints, and the principles she upholds in life. She is capable of a lot more than you allow yourself to opine about her.

I know of a lady who had troubles winning over her in-laws and relatives in her husband’s extended family. At first, it was because she was doing a job and refused to quit it even after marriage. Her office was conveniently situated nearby their house; she would go in the morning after preparing breakfast and come back in the evening, would do household works and make dinner. Her mother-in-law took care of the everyday lunch but not without complaint. She was named ‘modern woman’ by her who doesn’t give much attention to family life and doesn’t take care of her ‘grihasti’. This young lady was undeterred by this and took it as a challenge to make everyone understand the importance of making a career along with devoting time for a family life. Today after years she has become an inspiration in the household of members of three generations.

Let go of the stereotypes. Today short hair stands for willpower, statement, taking your stand and telling the world that you are who you are, not what they think you to be. The perspective of people needs to change. Society needs to empathize more and stop judging at every glance. You need to know the person before you can make an opinion on or comment on the choices she makes in her life.

Take a look at some of the startling figures that the Nihar Naturals #IAmCapable survey conducted by Nielsen India reveals:

a. 69% of men agree that their judgment of women is based on their looks.

b. 64% of women agree that the judgments passed on them have affected their ability to reach their true potential.

c. 70%of women agree that majority of judgments on women are from family members or friends rather than strangers.

d. 72% of women agree that working women face more judgments on their looks or their clothes than housewives.

I’m breaking stereotypes based on appearance by sharing my experience for the #IAmCapable activity at BlogAdda in association with Nihar Naturals.


Queeristan by Parmesh Sahani

  Queeristan (Amazon Link) Thanks to Audible Free Trial I listened to this amazing non-fiction on LGBTQ inclusion in Indian workplaces. Author Parmesh Sahani identifies as gay Indian, working closely with Godrej higher management and employees for years to create an inclusive workplace, both legally and in spirit. This book is a result of those years of experience, research, collaboration with individuals from difference spectrum of the society and organizations who has successfully transitioned into a queer friendly one.   Indian history is inclusive. From the Khajuraho temple architectures, to Konark to the Rig Veda, there is existing proofs even 2000 years ago of Indian inclusiveness of queer. It’s the draconian British law that criminalised it, which was scraped in 2009, came into effect once again following a sad judgement in 2013 and eventually was scraped off for good in 2018. I am in awe of the lawyers who fought this legal battle- colleagues and partners – Arundhati Katju

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