All those moments in life that leave an impression, leave you in deep thought,and contemplation.
Find book reviews for reading that feeds the soul. Personal experiences, travel stories- for spirituality is a daily pursuit. Movie and art, as what works better therapy than these.
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It has been several weeks since I last wrote to you.
didn’t know what to write about. About your songs that I keep listening to, day
in and day out, in a loop; about the forums that I regularly visit and write in
anonymously; about the fan fictions that I read about you; or about the doodles
that I make of your name in the corners of notebooks while making futile
attempts at studying, or about the multiple times I gather courage to call you,
but cut the call just before it connects. I don’t know what stops me. Perhaps I
fear you have forgotten me in these three long years. I don’t want to know it
for real. I want to hear your voice, but I can’t bear it if you don’t recognize
People here adore you, as they do in the rest of the
country. Every café, every shopping mall makes it a point to include your song
in their daily playlist. Every cab tunes in to listen to your interview. And
the neighbors include the latest updates about you in every chitchat. My
friends gossip about your fashion statements, latest hairstyle, your country
tours and your upcoming stage shows. It’s you and you everywhere- in the
entertainment page of every daily, in the catchy pictures of the brands you
endorse, and in the cover page of more than half of the local magazines.
All this seems so surreal. It takes me a while to believe
that my childhood spent with you was real. To remind myself that the face in
the photographs I possess is yours and the person I held hands with while
walking barefoot along the sea shore was you. Do you remember when the old tree
house came crashing down on me? You fussed over me as if I were a hurt child
unsure of myself. And remember the crowded bus we took to the next town to
visit mother. You kept me calm with your roughly composed songs when my phobia
took over. You weird intonations always made me laugh. I still remember those
songs. My favorite ones are ‘Echo’, ‘From the Terrace’ and ‘Will you marry me?’
I wonder why you don’t include these in any of your albums.
I cherish these memories with all my heart. I wonder if you
do too. I wonder when I can see you again in person.
Or if I can, at all.
My pillows are all wet. My eyes are swollen. And I can’t
seem to control myself. I don’t know if it’s grief or happiness. I’m confused. I’m
not in my right mind perhaps.
I can’t seem to think
anything other than your words. You said you already had a special someone in
your heart, in the chat show this evening, when asked about the rumors and
linkups. And the honesty and intensity with which you said it… I don’t know
what I feel is hope or despair. Hope is a dangerous thing. I’m already on the
edges; I don’t want to crumble down. And I don’t even have a choice. I can’t
shut you out. It’s impossible for me. Everything in this town reminds me of
I received one of the few invitations to your concert that
you had given away for free for the townsfolk. I don’t know if I was meant to
get one, or it was by chance. Dear me, let’s try and believe the latter. I’ve
decided to go, though. I have decided to gather all my courage and meet you
this time. It shall take every ounce of my will power to be in the crowd that’d
be cheering you. But I will go, or else, perhaps I won’t get a chance in
Waiting for the days to pass.
I am here, at your concert right now. I am eagerly waiting
for the album launch and your performance. I can’t tell you how excited I am.
Words fail me. And this place is huge; I had never been to one. Thankfully the
seats around me are empty till now, so I’m fine here.
They have announced your name and the music has started, but
where are you.
If I could live one of my past days once again, I would
I watched him with sweet remembrance as he entered the stage
and made it his own. I watched him smile at the crowd, his eyes searching as
the focus shifted from one end of the gallery to the other. The faces in the
crowd were magnified in the larger screen. He waved his hand delightfully. And
then his eyes found me. With a smile so big, he waved both his hands and began,
“In my old memories, you’re there, expecting me- beckoning as though
whispering…”. I stood and cheered for
him along with the crowd. I realized it was ‘Echo’- one of those songs that I
loved, with revised lyrics and tunes. I was overwhelmed. I fell in love with
the song once more.
I was shouting and clapping with the people around me, when the
focus rested on me. I was surprised for a second. He was about to sing another
song, but he was moving though the crowd as the music began. He came up the
steps and stopped right in front of me. I was so happy to see him that I could
have hugged him right then, but something stopped me. I knew that music. “Will
you marry me? Will you live forever with me?” he then began, in front of those
thousands of people, and perhaps the entire country that was witnessing this
live. The entire six minutes that the song took, I was too shocked to react. I
just looked at him as he circled around me, looking back and smiling at me
I fell in love with
him once more, all over again.
Empress Ki is the most elaborate, gripping, and thrilling series I have watched this year. And at 51 episodes, it is the longest Korean drama series I have ever watched. Even though the number seems daunting and too much, it’s worth it all. If you like period dramas, you won’t want to give this one a miss.
It was in 2016 that I first read about Empress Ki, the historical drama that had garnered much praise and accolades from the audience and critics alike. Most Korean dramas are just 16 or 20 episodes long. So 51 seemed never-ending to me then. It wasn’t until 2017 that I decided to at least try the first episode. And I was hooked. But owing to the various circumstances I didn’t continue watching it. It was just last month that I remembered this epic story and watched it to completion within just a few days. Believe it or not, midway through it, I was almost literally pulling my hair out, in anticipation of what would happen next.
I would have given this magnum opus 10/10 had it stopp…
I have always been the one to leave first. Be it luck or circumstance, it has always been this way. Some of the times it has been my decision to venture out of my comfort zone first before all my peers decide to do the same and I am left behind, alone in the old world. The decisions are out of fear of being left alone, most of the times. Or is it self-preservation instead?
I am a person who takes time to adapt, make new friends, get accustomed to new surroundings- an unlikely one to leave first- yet I do. You might think me selfish, but I am just afraid, and I decide to take care of myself first. Some might see this as a major risk-taking attitude, but I mostly see it as fleeing before the 'desertion' hits me instead. Now that's a strong word indeed. I am always in search of safe ground, always so insecure and calculating my moves lest I end up being alone on the island.
Paranoiac. Several things bother me at once. What if my peers get on with their lives leaving me behi…
"When the ego dies, the soul awakes." - Mahatma Gandhi
Why do you have such a huge ego? You cannot wear your family's name on your sleeve as an identity forever. The world wouldn't see you through the eyes of your parents who have pampered you so much for the better part of your life. Here in the real world, you will get what you give. Respect begets respect. Selfishness begets selfishness. Hate begets hate. And your 'i don't care', 'i don't give a damn', 'i am paying money for that', 'i will do as I please' attitude will give you the same.
Respect is earned. Agreed. But you should give it first to earn it back. The other person should and must be respected by default despite his class, caste, job and family background, until and unless he proves unworthy of it with time. I stand strongly by this belief.
There can be no excuse for disregard. The way you speak to me about people tells me the way you might be speaking about me t…
One Friday evening, as I was feeling a bit lonely and homesick with nothing much to do, not even strolling on the terrace viewing the ever so beautiful mountains since it was raining hard- thus it also contributing to my gloomy mood, I decided to watch Before Sunrise. Yes, once again. A first for me. I rarely re-watch a movie. Yearning for a light-hearted yet meaningful conversation this was the best choice I had. My hostel mates were out in the city and all the people I called up were busy. Luck by chance. Thanks to the superb uninterrupted internet connection I had a great 1 hour 40 minutes that evening.
"Experiencing the otherworldly. When morning comes, we would all turn into pumpkins."
Even though it sounds like a cliche today, unplanned trips, adventures in life, serendipity and providence are romantic. Before Sunrise has all of these, when strangers indulge in light conversations, grow intrigued about each other's lives, and spend time in each other's company …
Horse riding was no cake walk for me.
I feigned ignorance for months about the rule for Princesses to learn to tackle a beast like that. For weeks I would hide somewhere innocently when it was time for the lessons. The experts appointed for this task left their posts within weeks. Hah! I would make each one leave. It’s a war now, between my father - The King and me.
One morning I spotted a rather young man near the stables. The maids were gossiping how handsome he was. Some whispered he was a year or two senior to me. Huh! He must have just graduated then. Father is appointing amateurs now, I see. Had I not been home-schooled, I would have known school life for myself.
I chose the haystacks in the courtyard of the servants’ quarters to hide that day, much pleased with my choice. The sky was beautiful and so were the house-sparrows. Just as I admired my surroundings, a head popped in front of me from nowhere.
“So here you are. You’re late for your classes. Let’s go now,” he pulled …
It is human nature to dwell in the past, worry about the future
and forget all about the present. I still miss the days spent in Hyderabad. I
miss the study schedules, eating out, street shopping, and the city tours. I
miss the roads, the townships and the metros. But I clearly remember that I
just wanted the days to pass quickly so that I could return home, while I was
there. And today I miss the view from the terrace of the ladies hostel we
stayed in, the floral decorations with chalk, colors and flowers, the flower
market, the abundance of curd during lunch hours, the constant ‘amma’ recitals
by our wardens and so much more.
One of the highlights of the hostel life in Hyderabad at Sri
Kamali was queuing up for tea, puri and dosa during breakfast time, and then
hurrying to secure a chair the very next moment. And conversations and
complaints flowed unhindered during these hours in many languages at once- the
most prominent ones being Telugu, Kannada, Malayalam, Marathi and English.…